Why did Donald Trump look so old during the debate?

I hope you’re sitting down for this: Donald Trump looked and sounded so very old at the debate because…[deep breath]…Donald Trump is very old.

Truly, Trump has been living a teenager’s best life for quite a while now like sleeping with porn stars, eating KFC on his private jet, s***ting in a gold toilet, making a Slovenian call girl the First Lady after picking her out of a nude catalogue, scowling angrily at judges and prosecutors as he breaks the law with impunity like a juvenile delinquent, refusing to accept losses as though fair elections are just “bad calls” from the referee at a high school football game, thinking he’s entitled to jobs he has absolutely no experience to get (like the Presidency) and should be doing them forever…

I know, I know, it sounds crazy, right? …Because the media has never put much focus on his age and obvious mental decline (often calling him “robust” for shouting lies and for such vigorous displays as being able to walk onto the stage without a walker)…because the GOP centered the entire 2024 RNC around projecting a “He-Man” image that would appeal to young men (Hulk Hogan, Kid Rock, Dana White, JD Vance as running mate, few icky girls around)…and because Trump himself is in pathological denial of his own age.

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Because Trump has never displayed an ounce of maturity or introspection, it is easy to forget that he’s not 17-years-old, and would be the oldest President ever if he were to win in November. …I know his followers prefer to think of him as some steamed-up alpha male out of a porno (they practically creamed their pants over his “fight” response to the shooting), so engagements where Trump has to actually speak—like his rambling 93-minute RNC acceptance speech where he looked like the foolish narcissist he’s always been or his pitiful debate performance—usually have them scratching their heads…